Today's topic is teamwork. We learn from an early age that we have to learn to share and play nicely with our friends and classmates. Somewhere down the line we learn to be independent and accepting help means we are weak. I beg to differ. It is mixed messages that hinder our growth as individuals and as couples.
We get so caught up with maintaining our independence and frown upon those who are labeled "co-dependent". Can there be a happy medium? Absolutely. It is the interdependent state that we should strive to be in.
Interdependence means you and another person are mutually dependent on each other. God is dependent on us to carry out His will. We are dependent on God to hold true to his promises. It's a win-win. In relationships, we are to be dependent on our significant others to hold true to their promises, vows, and commitments to the relationship. In likeness, they expect the same from us.
So why is it so hard for us to depend on someone else? A marriage may work with only one person working at it, but eventually they get tired and grow weary of the future. It takes two. Both of you made the mutual decision to enter into a state of matrimony or advance your relationship status. So when did it become okay for you to stop holding up your end? When did it become okay for your partner to press pause and "do them"?
I encourage you to go back to the basics. Go back to the reasons you all first decided to become interdependent. Go back to the romantic state of your relationship and spend time examining what worked and try to build on that. It is not to say that you will spend your days reminiscing on what was and dig up past hurts. This is not to blame any one person for failed attempts. It is simply to get you to understand that it takes two to make a marriage/relationship work.
It is fun to swing, but it is better to have someone pushing you and motivating you to go higher. Don't they deserve the same thing from you?